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Its started! The ashes are over, done, dusted and put away for another couple of years...... but it hasnt stopped the satirists from carrying on.... here are a few of my favourites observations of the last Ashes series.... Feel free to add any of your own...
Q. What is the height of optimism?
A. An Australian batsman applying sunscreen.
Q. What does Michael Clarke put in his hands to make sure the next ball almost always takes a wicket?
A. A bat.
Q. What would Jimmy Anderson be if he was an Australian?
A. An all-rounder.
Q. What is the Australian version of a hat-trick?
A. Three runs in three balls.
Q. What do you call an Australian with 100 runs against his name?
A. A bowler.
Q. What is the most proficient form of footwork displayed by Australian batsmen?
A. The walk back to the pavilion.
Q. Who has the easiest job in the Australian squad?
A. The guy who removes the red ball marks from the bats.
Q. Whats the Australian version of LBW?
A. Lost, Beaten, Walloped.
Q. Why cant Aussies open bottles?
A. Because they dont have any openers.
Q. What do you call an Australian with a bottle of champagne in his hand?
A. A waiter.
Q. What do you call a world class Australian?
A. Retired.
Q. What do you get if you cross the Australian cricket team with an Oxo cube?
A. Laughing stock.
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